Friday, February 4, 2011

Aging Jadedly

I think there are always going to be "watershed" moments in life that catch you off guard, moments that you knew somehow in the recesses of your mind would eventually show up but you hoped like mad they wouldn't. 

I had one of those moments about 3 weeks ago when I went for my bi-annual eye exam which should have been booked about 6 years ago.  Not a priority in my busy life until now and in my estimation, totally unnecessary.  Well, I don't know which was worse...not being able to see clearly or succumbing to the aging process and finally getting glasses.  My only way to deal with it was to get a rockin' pair of glasses that had "hot mama" written all over them.  Okay, not exactly rockin' but trendy.  Ok not trendy either, but better than a matronly pair that prematurely threw me into the 65+ club.  Yah, I know I'll eventually get there anyway but I don't want to hasten the day!

The effort it takes these days to stay looking young(ish) has become exhausting!  I have to workout for hours to get the same results I used to get from painting my nails. My hair is demanding more attention than my husband, and wrinkles...don't even get me started.  It's become a full-time job getting myself ready to leave the house in the morning. 

I want to fight back somehow and begin plotting devious ways to outwit my aging self...climb mountains , forge rivers, ride elephants I mutter through clenched teeth when really my first concern should be that my girls aren't hitting the elastisized waistband of my polyester pull-up pants and my chin is free of the rouge hair I can now see with my newly acquired glasses.  Ah the irony of it all!

I guess I have not arrived at this point in life without learning a few things and that is the true beauty of experience.  I now give myself permission to say exactly what I want but have learnt to say things with grace.  Occassionaly I let myself eat cake and drink wine knowing that I will go to the gym each day and work it off.  Friendships have taken on a greater depth of meaning and I often find myself thinking about what a blessing it is that I am surrounded by wonderful people.  My soul mate has become my very essence and surprisingly I have not lost who I am because of it.  Rather, I have been enhanced and invigorated, encouraged to be expressive.

I guess the moral of the story is~if you're going to be jaded don't direct it towards might as well not waste time on something that's going to happen whether you like it or not.  And maybe go get those glasses you've been putting off so at least you can see when it's time to pluck or poke, maybe highlight or tighten.  Most of all, have fun each day even if it has to be at your own expense! 

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